Christmas is usually the time we spend with our loved ones. This year, it isn’t for me. It’s not that I don’t love my family. I do very much love them but they have lately been doing everything that they can to get in my business. I don’t want that. I love them for what they feel like they are trying to accomplish by involving themselves so much in my personal life, or trying to, but they simply are unable to take ‘no’ for an answer. That’s why I’ve rented out a JJH Apartment unit in Singapore this year – to flee, basically.
It’s drastic, trust me. I know exactly how drastic of a decision it was to vacation in Singapore over staying with my family back home as I usually do. Christmas Eve has always been an awesome time. Yes, my fiance and I did split up this year. Yes, it was hard. And yes, it has been one of the most emotionally trying times of my life that I’ve ever had to go through. It’s going to be my first Christmas without her in nearly ten years. It’s a big deal, I understand this. I just wish my family understood that I can cope with it.
I know that they are just worried about me. I love them for that. I love them more than they can possibly know. They have shown me more support than I ever expected to have but this is something that I am going to have to learn to deal with on my own. If I need someone to be, I’ll turn to them. They’ve made it more than clear that they are going to be there for me but I think I need to be there for myself before I can move on.